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Many quotes in imdb but may not include below: Do you know the best thing about mom parties? They end at exactly 11:00. === I mean, I sat here and watched you wait until your kid fell asleep before you got high. === You see, what works for my daughter almost never works for my son. And whenever I think I'm actually starting to figure my kids out, they grow up and I'm back to square one. So, the truth is, when it comes to being a mom, I have no fxcking clue what I'm doing. And you know what? I don't think anyone does. I think we're all bad moms, and you know why? Because being a mom today is impossible!